The Prodigal Bloggers

We're baaack! We are sure we aren't the only mommy bloggers who have made one of their top New Year's resolutions: Blog more regularly. But we have taken many steps to ensure that we will stick to our promise to ourselves and our readers who enjoyed what we had to say when we first launched our website: we've dealt with some technological glitches (thanks Rob), and we've read lots and lots of other mommy blogs to erase any fears that we had that we weren't really blogging properly. Another big hurdle: we are almost done writing our book (Twin Set: Moms of Multiples Share Survive and Thrive Secrets, The Crown Publishing Group, July 2008). Truth be told, writing this book took more time, energy, babysitting, obscenely early morning wake-ups (or in Cathy's case, late nights), coffee, diet Coke, Advil and red wine than I thought it would. But like most things in life, what you work hardest at usually has the biggest rewards. We really do think this book will be helpful to many, many moms of multiples out there.



This book is truly a labor of love, and I consider it to be my fourth child. It took us about a year to write the business pitch/book proposal, find an agent and get a book deal. Then there was the matter of actually writing the survey, putting it on-line, culling the results, and writing the book. One thing that helped us get it all done was constantly asking our editor to give us deadlines. We needed to know what was expected of us at all times so that we could plan for our top priorities: our families. Our editor was pleasantly surprised that we were so into having deadlines, but we just told her it was a twin mom thing (we are sure many of you know what we mean). We handed in the first draft of our book in the beginning of summer 07, rewrote the entire book over the summer, revised it again this fall, and we are now waiting for it to come back to us in a couple of weeks as a complete printed entity.



In addition to crafting the survey and writing the book, we've been busy (like you) raising our kids. My twins are now 3 1/2. I think they were only 15 months when we started this venture. I have now moved into the phase of parenting where I often feel more like a referee than a mom. When the twins are fighting with each other or their big sis (now 6 1/2), I often quote that guy Tim Gunn from Bravo's Project Runway, saying "Make it work!" The moms who answered our survey (each and every one is amazing) really gave me some great advice about treating twins like individuals. When they are old enough to get in verbal and physical scuffles with each other, many of our survey moms recommend letting the twins resolve things themselves so it doesn't look like you are playing favorites.



Twins, at least mine, do keep track of how mommy parents. Mine are also smart enough to tell me when they think I am being unfair. One thing I have done this school year to help them feel more like individuals is place them in separate activities. My son really seems to relish having his own boy time: he can't wait for the two times a week he has his sports activities (which he chose). And his twin sister feels equally excited about her dance and gymnastics class. I think it's easy for them to enjoy this independence because they still share the same bedroom and preschool class. They need their breathing room.



This creates more work for me, however, because instead of having the luxury of dropping off two kids for 45 minutes, I am only dropping off one and having to find ways to keep the other entertained in the parent waiting area or run a quick errand with a twin in tow. Again, the extra work for me is usually worth it. Once in a while, the twin who is not busy in the activity will cheer for the other one who is earning another stripe on his karate belt or showing off her version of the Chinese Tea dance from the Nutcracker with her fellow ballerinas. Giving my twins room to explore their own interests seems to give them more appreciation for each other. Well, at least for about 45 minutes, four times a week (two activities for each twin). Then it's back to me saying, "Make it work."